Thursday, February 26, 2015

Why Yes, I Went Pink: My Rose Colored Glasses

I did something today....something brave and bold, something I love...I dyed my hair pink. For a lot of people changing their hair doesn't mean a whole lot. For me, I usually change my hair because I have a part of myself I want to express, or because I have always felt feelings could be mirrored in colors.
According to color psychology (yes that's real), the color pink " represents compassion, nurturing and love. It relates to unconditional love and understanding, and the giving and receiving of nurturing. " My oldest niece has a book she loves called I Like Myself Because I'm Me. I don't know that I have ever felt that way.
The Bible says Love others as you love yourself. If you don't love yourself then the way you love others will be tainted with struggle and pain.
I have found myself in a new season, a season of tears, growth, frustration and an undying peace. As I thought about it I realized part of the reason I struggle with loving myself is that I am not myself. I have been so scared to be who I really am because I always felt like I had something to prove. And you know what? I don't. Jesus loves me, my family loves me, my friends love me, and finally, finally, I love myself.
I love being bold. I love pulling things off other people are scared to try. But most of all, I love that Jesus loves me. He knows I will ALWAYS want to change my hair, I will always love the idea of having lots of tattoos and piercings even if I can't have any more. He knows that as much as I run from anyone with nurturing and compassion, that is exactly what I need.  He knows me, and He loves all of me.
So, I went pink because there is no hiding pink hair. I went pink because I will no longer run from love and nurturing. 
When my loving older brother said "Oh! Goodness why on earth did you go pink?" I lovingly reminded him of his words to me "When it comes to your hair, you don't care if anyone else likes it, you will pull it off if you like it."
So, in all honesty, this pink wasn't about anyone but me. Me finally expressing who Jesus made me to be. Bold, loving, courageous, steadfast, creative...free.
Me feeling like enough in my dependence, my tears, my broken, Me discovering my inner glitter. Because honestly, I had forgotten what inner glitter feels like.
The fact that BerkleyLove's eyes got huge and she said "Aunt Sarah I LOVE your hair it is my favorite color," was just a lovely bonus.
So here's to life in all of its pink hued glory. It just hit me that my soul sister prayed I would have "rose colored glasses," I suppose pink hair is one way to do that :)
Here's to the life I have chosen, Jesus has been good enough to give me lots of glitter! Thank you all for loving me through this journey

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